30 Things I Learned in my First 30 Days of Sobriety
Girlfriends are SO important. Make time for them. The boys you’re flirting with won’t be there to hold you when you cry.
Therapy is equally as important. Once you find the right therapist, what you can uncover and work through is invaluable.
Depression and anxiety will inevitably try to attack you, most especially in your first 30 days. Removing the substance you used to cope for so long causes your mind and body to go into shock and actually deal with things. Rather than giving in to the substance to numb the negative emotions, try to look at them with gratitude, that you have the opportunity to actually feel things again.
Remember that sobriety and recovery is not Brandy Melville. It is not one size fits all. Don’t let anyone tell you that you have to follow a certain criteria or do it a certain way to be successful. It is YOUR journey, not anyone else’s.
Advocate for yourself. No one else is gonna do it for you.
MOVE! Move your body. Getting your blood pumping – SWEATING – will not only make you feel strong and accomplished, but provide you with endorphins that will ease the anxiety and depression.
Finding a program to get involved in is crucial for accountability. It doesn’t have to be AA/CA/NA, but finding a sober community will allow you to form friendships with people who know exactly what you’re going through.
Removing toxic people from your life that drag you down will increase your chances of staying sober by an astronomical rate.
Making gratitude lists every morning is important for keeping things in perspective. My therapist told me to make lists where “the obvious things are off limits,” meaning things like friends/family/being alive. Everyone knows you’re grateful for those things. Mine usually consist of things like making green lights, smiles from strangers, the smell of coffee brewing, or texts from my baby sister. It’ll make you appreciate the little things so much more.
Know your limits. Don’t take on too much too quickly. You’ve just made an enormous life change – the last thing you need is to exhaust your newfound energy and end up drinking or using again because you can’t handle the pressure.
People will more than likely have opinions about your recovery journey; opinions that are completely colored by their own experience. It’s up to you to decide if their opinion is worth considering or even listening to.
Call your grandma. She’s worried about you.
Find hobbies that don’t involve drinking. Run. Hike. Swim. Paint. Sing. Do anything that will remind you being sober is better than waking up with a wicked hangover and zero memory of what happened last night.
Go to the doctor! Do not neglect this. Chances are, if you drank as much as I did, your body is in rough shape. Get some blood tests done to make sure your insides aren’t damaged beyond repair.
Buy yourself flowers.
As mentioned above, accountability is hugely important. Find yourself a sober buddy or a mentor that you can call or text every day (mutually) to check in with one another, to ensure you’re both meeting your goals.
Don’t put yourself in situations where you might feel like you want to, or even have to drink. See also: don’t go to a bar or a liquor store in your first month of being sober. I feel as though that’s pretty self explanatory.
Make a list of relapse warning signs. I know I’m close to drinking again if I’m terribly bored or depressed. Once you have that list, come up with a couple ways to combat each warning sign.
If you don’t already have one, get a job. Having a schedule or some kind of structure is critical - at least for me. Having nothing to do is fun sometimes, but too much of it may lead to loneliness, isolation, depression, anxiety or boredom. All of which are huge triggers. Besides, there’s only so much Gossip Girl you can watch per day.
Volunteer. Or help someone without them having to ask. Take the focus off yourself.
Find a podcast or audiobook you’re interested in to listen to in the car. It’s better than listening to music about bitches and drugs and parties.
Don’t be afraid to speak openly about your addiction. What I sometimes fail to realize is that my weaknesses make me stronger, and more relatable. Chances are, someone out there needs to hear what you have to say.
Replacing one addiction with another is going to eventually lead you back to your original addiction. I have to remind myself daily that I don’t really need those shoes.
Don’t expect people who aren’t sober/haven’t struggled with addiction to understand what you’re going through.
Don’t expect people to change their behavior just because you did.
People will continue to disappoint you, whether you’re sober or not.
Being sober is incredibly difficult, especially at first.
It’s also incredibly worth it.
You’re worth it.
You CAN do this.
